Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Messages of Love

Moe once told me that she wanted to be there for me during the wedding planning process. She wanted to be the one I came to when I was stressed or frustrated, to be the person I could talk to and vent to when I needed. She would be there for whatever I needed help with. I wasn't far enough into planning to take her up on this offer before she left.

The fiance and I were talking about wedding stuff at lunch and I've been thinking/stressing most of the day now. I was standing at my stove cooking quesadillas, stressing about the wedding and how we're going to make it work in the modest budget we have available, including the honeymoon. As I continued stressing, I started thinking how this would be a time to talk to Moe, to share my fears and stresses and hear her tell me that it was going to work out and then make a few brilliant suggestions to help it work. I was stressing how I didn't know what I was going to do now, because Moe isn't here anymore. Who was I going to talk to?

As I was standing there in the midst of these thoughts, mentally freaking out, I get this text message from the fiance:

Moe loves u princess

I can't tell you exactly what went through my mind at that moment. I texted the fiance back and said I know. A lil random, but i know. She loves you too.

It was his reply that got me: Hahaha not what I meant but she does I meant muah
I was stunned. I replied with Wow, and then completely lost it when he said Hahaha yea something happened.

Yeah, Moe used you to send me a message. Right when I needed it most. Right when I was stressed and freaking out and worried. Right when I was thinking about how much I needed her to be here, for so many reasons, not just for this. And then came the text.

Moe loves u princess

Not exactly an answer, but it's all I needed to know. The fiance has a Blackberry. Muah coming out as Moe was not an accidental typo. Fresh tears subsiding, I know I can do this. So does Moe.


Anonymous said...

I know you can do this. You'll be fine.

I don't know if this will help or not, but this blogger has written before about planning a wedding on a budget: http://www.suddenlyfrugal.com/?s=wedding.

Fresh Mommy said...

Awwww, wow what a story. That was so great for you! :) Just take a deep breath and remember why you're getting married. It will all work out, take it one step at a time and one day at a time. You will have a beautiful wedding!!! :)

Jessica said...

Moments like that are so refreshing and they always seem to come at just the right time! What a special surprise for you. :)

Jaina said...

Jen-Thanks, I think you're right. And thanks for the link, I'm totally checking it out.

Tabitha-Thank you :) I did calm down last night and think I might have a few new ideas to get things working.

Jessica-They really are...totally made me cry, but in a good way.

Renie Burghardt said...

Wow, well, it was a reminder that you always knew in your heart anyway, Jaina. Be happy. Your day will be wonderul.

Hugs and blessings,


The Chic Chauffeur said...

Take care Jaina. You are in my thoughts....

and you CAN do this! Hang in there!

Kelly Deneen said...

You CAN do this! I am still thinking of you. *hugs*

Jaina said...

Renie-I did know it, but it meant so much to hear it again in that way. Thank you :)

Chic-::hugs:: Thank you so much.

Kelly-Thank you :) ::hugs::

EatPlayLove said...

I am sorry for your loss, it must be hard. I know how hard it is.

Try not to become overwhelmed by the wedding planning, it will be a beautiful day. All those constant little details just fall into place and it will be a celebration of your love!

Heidi said...

I have chills and a choked up feeling. What an incredible message! I am so glad that you have written this down so that you will always remember it. The more time that passes you will need this little reminder!
Thank you so much for sharing.

Anonymous said...

That really gave me tingles because I do believe that was a message from Moe, coming through from a typo, just when you needed it. She is with you, in your heart, watching over you and you'll continue to see more signs like this as time goes on. Christie and I do, and we look at each other and smile and say, "that was from your mom."

I'm so very sorry for your loss. Grief takes time, it has its ups and downs, but in the end, you will be okay. You were so blessed to have someone as wonderful and special as moe in your life.

The wedding will be beautiful, perfect. You will see how everything will work itself out, fall into the exact perfect place!!!!

You have so much love all around you, you are such an amazing, loving and giving person that you deserve nothing less.

Jaina said...

Denise-Thank you, it is hard, but it's getting better. I know you're right about the wedding planning, things are finally starting to look like they're coming together. I just had to take a deep breath and keep going.

Heidi-It was definitely a moment worth remembering. It still gives me the chills and makes me grin, Moe is awesome like that. I'm very glad I wrote it down right after it happened. I needed to capture that moment, to hold onto it.

Cheryl-I'm glad that you and Christie have these moments too. I'm glad to know that they don't disappear with time. You are such a wonderful friend, you absolutely make me smile. Thank you so much. ::hugs::

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